FEELING RAZOR SHARP

When you bounce back from an illness, sometimes you feel "razor" sharp. That's how I am feeling right now.



When you are in this mode, the world starts to slow down just a little bit. I feel like I can see things long before they happen. I am seeing the effect in advance, long before I recognize the cause.



When i am talking to people, I tend to understand and anticipate the direction of their minds, long before they articulate it. I am not sure if it is just reading their body language more intuitively, or picking up subtleties in the way they move their eyes.



Obviously, everyone wants to be heard, they need to be validated, that is always a given. When you are "sharp" and toxin free (not gluten free) and you are close to your pure potentiality, you just are flowing.



There used to be a tennis player named Miloslav Mecir (pronounced masheesh) who was known for just being able to flow with the opponents shots and movements and counter them effortlessly. That is how I am feeling these days. I love to be in this mode.



The question is how does one remain here, in the zone.....everyday.
There is always Probiotics and Ginko Biloba, but they have an artificiality about them even if they originate in the health food realm.



I think the way to not sabotage this state of being is to appreciate it in the moment. Feel it and flow with it. Smile at people and listen, even if you got their point about 5 minutes earlier.


I have been clogged mentally and unavailable to people many times, so I know how good it is to have somebody on the other end with some semblance of patience and virtue.



The Future plans initiative is where you have to capitalize when you are "sharp". Now is the time to map out exact details of how you are going to move to Hong Kong or to write the screenplay (it is a killer), or to go on the trip to Morocco in the fall.



I find that if they are indeed right that time is indeed an illusion (I mention this all the time and have a tattoo relating to this uplifting thought) then you can feel more at ease bridging different universes and stomping on verboten thoughts that you feel are limiting your growth.




There will always be those people around you that don't seem to get it... They are not bad people with diabolical intentions.....they are just stagnant and repetitive in their thoughts and lifestyle and couldn't see themselves changing, or moving away, or quitting smoking or or giving up their Reality TV. They just are seeking personal comfort and trying to make it through.




Wish these people well with a wink of your eye and flow past them.....Surround yourself with Creative innovators and people whose ideas are living a little on the edge. That's where you need to be. That's where you are going to fit in and make a difference.




We can't always be living outside the box however, and there is alot to be said for consistency and normalcy. It needs to be tempered though with something special in order to really break through and produce that idea that will set you apart. If you are moving quickly mentally and your focus seems to be in sync with new ideas, it feels great to just go with it and acknowledge it.



We are all capable of producing extraordinary results. It is a question for me and possibly for you, of how to tap into that magic area on a consistent basis. It can be done. Amazing results can manifest before your eyes with a little bit of diligence. This is what I have been looking for.



There is a book called "The Lazy man's guide to enlightenment" (Thadeas Golas) that I just recently re-read and I still got a little bit of a kick from just being back with those words once again.



It feels right to be inspired, and it feels more than right to inspire. If we can pull back the "curtains" there is an enormous amount to be revealed.



RL

THE SELFLESS HEART

Recently I was quite sick for a week or so, actually it manifested far before that, but the sickness part lasted about a week.



My Girlfriend came to live with me for about 5 days during the worst of the time.


I have to say that I was really amazed at how another human being can have so much compassion and love for a person that they really have only known for a relatively short time.


I was a grumpy, sweaty, self pitying imbecile (with a heart) most of the time.


To me, this was the very indication I needed that my life was over and if not completely over, certainly at the crossroads of all crossroads.


"This whole thing is horrible, it's sad and disgusting" I would blurt out.


In return, my Girlfriend would say something like " you will turn it around, you are a talented guy with incredible potential and this is just a test" Amazing I thought. She seems to really know that this is true and I am losing all my faith.


Now we did get to have our fun personal times of watching programs together,cuddling and cooking alot of healthy meals, but to me, it didn't make up for how much life seemed to "suck".


With all my optimism out the window, the toilet suddenly broke....Yes the toilet.
This didn't go over well with my ego.


Julie found humour in this toilet escapade at every corner and was often laughing uncontrollably at the irony involved. Especially at my gagging. I on the other hand saw it as a slap on the face from a higher power.


So while I griped about it, sweating in bed, I could here her in the washroom for hours trying to fix it. (Luckily it is working once more, how beautiful)


One day as I was sweating and moaning in bed, I observed my girl Julie, organizing and cleaning my entire place from top to bottom....It became like an obsession with her....She did the most thorough job ever in the history of mankind....I was dumbfounded.


I then begged her for a hug as I was feeling needy, and she said she would be right over, she was just a little sweaty, "give her a second".

She took my selfishness and made it seem silly but not pathetic.


The point I am trying to make is that I am so amazed by this special person and her big heart and I feel that I need to grow my Grinchly heart 10 times the size to keep up.


Is this the way most people are? I need to get with the program of uber compassion and grow up some.


I talked to a homeless musician the other day for about 10 minutes and all of a sudden I thought I was mother Theresa. Re-examination time Rick.



Maybe I will start that process tonight.


RL

STOPPING THE ANGER REACTION

When a person’s speech is full of anger, it is because he or she
suffers deeply. Because he has so much suffering, he becomes
full of bitterness. He is always ready to complain and blame
others for his problems. This is why you find it very unpleasant
to listen to him and try to avoid him.
To understand and transform anger, we must learn the
practice of compassionate listening and using loving speech.

TNH





I hate getting Angry. (get it) It's something that somebody told me recently that kind of sent me for a loop. I think of myself as quite a calm person and a pretty good listener most of the times. This friend said that she thought that I was very angry at the world.


I disagreed at the time. But maybe it is a little about CONTROL. I can't conceive of some of the actions of others and am often shocked at the ego and self absorption that I am witnessing daily.


On the other hand, I maybe seeing exactly what I need to see. I need to take a closer look at the way I see people and judge them.


I certainly feel alot of empathy for my fellow humans, but does that happen only on my own terms, when I can control my actions.

Deep stuff, but I want to be more available to figuring this out.



DISPELLING ANGER

To some degree, everyone is vulnerable to idol worship, whether through the pursuit of fame or the veneration of wealth and power. We revere images, especially the self-image we feel we must project to others.

The most blatant form of idolatry, is ANGER. Something external is controlling our emotions and reactions.

When a computer crashes, losing our important files, and we erupt in anger, we have just bowed down before the silicon idol. When a car cuts us off on the freeway and we curse with rage, we are idolizing the metallic god. When we lose our temper with our spouse or children and cause them undue pain, we are worshipping the idol of darkness.

When we devote ourselves to idols, allowing external situations or other people to instigate anger and rage within us, we sever our connection to the LIGHT. This is a big mistake, since the LIGHT is the true source for the fulfillment of our deepest desires.

Yehuda Berg



I cannot control the actions of other people and it just puts a hole in the pit of my stomach to react with anger in any situation. Recognizing that a change is needed is a step in the right direction.

RL

Who the FK is in the heart of Control here?

It's been a tough couple of weeks for me.


Although there were a couple of small emotional wins, I started to suspect that this wasn't going to be the time of power and satisfaction that I originally had been counting on.



It became more of a time of vacillation and very poor decision making.




Instead of all those wonderful summer courses and ingenious money making schemes that seemed right there for the taking, my mind started to wonder to little bizarre thoughts like....."maybe i should spend the entire summer on the beach.....writing" or perhaps "a gun" might be a necessary apparatus in my life.



Where did this all come from? I had a beautiful new girlfriend, and a very supportive family, and some solid dynamic friends, but something felt strangely missing....



I developed a tooth ache and started to secretly criticize the very core of people I really admired for years....What was this all about?


Was going to see Lady Gaga for 10 minutes actually going to send me out to the bars again after a year of good health?


Why did I care that Justin Bieber was dating some girl I never heard of before? Or that Kate Middleton looked great when the wind blew her skirt up..... What was really going on psycho guy?


The best way to end this little ditty is to say thanks to my friend Liz who gave me a new acoustic guitar to try to get me out of my strange rut. What a thoughtful present..It really is selfless ideas that can bring you back from the brink..



It looks like I am almost back....What a strange and weird ride.


To anyone I doubted....I take responsibility for just being a coward and a child. Not that pretty for sure.


RL

WE STILL HAVE TIME LOVE

When did we actually meet?


The darkness and your affinity for the candle. Words in the night that ask if I am alright? How could I be....I think.


Is anyone? Sometimes its garbage and sometimes its pure potential.


Sometimes it's a little taste of death....Oh, how tough you have to be....Running with that guy takes no genius...


Yet I am not there. Today we made a pact, a beautiful, implicit, old fashioned kissing pact.



Tomorrow, we are going to take it all back.




We are going to make it one, and I know that It will be me, that sweeps you up and carries you by the sea, like so many have before me.



It's a blood diamond... It's the Kansas in the Wizard of Oz....It pulls at me.


This world or judgement... and well....I don't want to scare you.


You are the most beautiful thing I was ever allowed to touch.



We are going to make it into a collage.. A pastiche....An old Bogart movie...



Its limitless...But something still pulls at me... Those ghosts, those people, those promises in the dark...



What year is it love?



Put your head on my shoulder....We have time....I really hope we do...



Inspired by you JP.


RL

THE PAIN OF THE MISUNDERSTANDING

When you get grossly misunderstood and you ultimately want approval, it hurts.



I had another really bitter and aggressive post on here, that I removed...Not entertainment, but part of my real life dealings.


My original way of coping with this was to try to verbally belittle the person(yesterday) who did this to me, without all the facts. (And it really looked good on paper and in my mind) Actually I should just let it go completely.


Sounds trite, but it is beneath me to act this way.


Like anyone, I am a work in progress. I think we are all worthwhile enough to be giving a chance, whether you are the real Rockstar or the Ceo, or the Woman with a big heart that struggles to be heard.



I am not sure what definition I fall under, but it really doesn't matter.



DEFINITIONS ARE FOR SUCKERS. (E-A)



Some decisions will rock some boats...Yet you don't want to make it so personal or have one of your oldest friends say that "I lost a bit of respect in you tonight man."


I don't approve of somebody trying to verbally or physically assault me or anybody else. It gets under my skin.


Reminds me of the Affinity Triangle formula.


"Life has three component parts: affinity, reality and communication. These form a TRIANGLE---ARC. They are interdependent to such a degree that if you interrupt any one of them, you will interrupt the flow of the other two."


Esoteric but interesting.


Apparently from time to time, I am not in communication or affinity with somebody ....and THAT COMPLETELY THROWS OF OUR COMMUNICATION.....as FRIENDS or LOVERS.


I am trying to not make all of this about me....Being misunderstood....some days....is a bitch....But i will bite it and try to not retaliate and hurt somebody with words and thoughts.


RL

THE BOOK I AM WRITING ON THE EDGE

LETS NOT BELIEVE OUR WAY TO MEDIOCRITY...COULD ANYTHING REALLY BE WORSE?




Some of us are just not sure how to tap into our greatest strengths and make them our lives work. Duh... To make them who we are.



That's why seeing LADY GAGA and Artists like her, can give us a little bit of that push in the right direction...This woman just believes so passionately, that you know who you are and you can tap into that potential at any time. (Passionate people are contagious)


You want to live in the real world though...We can't all play piano and strut around before Millions of People shouting....I am on the EDGE OF GLORY... and it comes off as just being honest.


I am meeting so many talented and spectacular people recently that have something really special to give...It may be great music or simply poetic words or unique hair styling, or just creating monumental baked goods...But I notice more than often that there is something missing, something untapped in their life pictures.


Some of us have some obvious and seemingly humungous obstacles that we are dealing with and that need to be overcome..Fears and Anger and Addiction..

For others..we are superstars in our own minds, but on the playing field of life, we are slightly unstable. We need a usable formula and something real and new to get through.. If we get over this thing that keeps dogging us....then we will be there...on the edge of Glory.


I am writing a book that synchronizes some of my struggles and theories that have challenged me, but ultimately worked for me in the end. It only took years (god) of trying and failing, and trying again, to figure this MOTHA out.


I am just a regular guy, but I have read it all and tried it all...and have some profound (to me anyway) insights to share.


Nothing is permanent...You have to be real, relevant and honest and giving...every single day of your life, or you could just become ordinary, or worse...7 seconds from now...



Here is a peak:




THE WAY OUT BOOK





1: Decide that you want to make a real change now.

2: Understand what you will be up against.

3: Envision your new potential life of freedom and success.

4: Get rid of your past blockages and failures.

5: Make it happen...NOW... with a formula that you already know.

6: Maintain your freedom and guard against the two triggers that might
cause you a relapse: Boredom and Overconfidence.


7: How to make sure that you “give back” to your community, and your friends
and family. (Including the world community) What you give out ....you will
naturally get back.


8: How to be one... wealthy Motha Fker with a conscience, and the only way to do
that, is to abandon your "ego" for good.




TO MY FRIENDS...MY ADVICE IS ALWAYS AVAILABLE. Who knows if it will help, or if it is personally applicable... I know I personally was always reticent to accept advice from the many... and would always want to know the credentials of the person it was coming from.



I AM REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO PUTTING IT ALL OUT THERE FOR PEOPLE TO TAKE IN...... THE REAL HONEST RIDE WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. I DIDN'T HAVE TO SIT ON ANY MOUNTAIN TOP...ALTHOUGH IT MIGHT HAVE ADDED SOMETHING SPECIAL.


I LOOK FORWARD TO HUMBLY SHARING.












RICK