A quick post

I think it was Camus that said that life isnt about finding meaning, but instead coming to realize there is no meaning...is this the cosmic joke?

Obviously the meaning and the joy is in the flow moments and the moments of accomplishment and the connection with family and friends. Who knows?

We are all on this earth together travelling through space on this spinning globe and everyone seems to be in such depression and anxiety over the journey. Older people like myself find it hard to put all the pain behind them and just to enjoy the moments, although the Adrenalin isn't flowing like it used to. Thats probably because I take pills to block it...haha.

My life is so good here that I have trouble just flowing with it sometimes. No conflicts, no real problems. No negative influences. In the end I am left with a million opportunities and new relationships that are waiting. We can really start living after 40 if we can find the key.

Now its off to another week of work, but that is fulfilling in itself.  One month to Canadian vacation.

Ciao

Photography website is up and running

                               ricklynnphotography.com


I am going back to Canada for a three week vacation. I have been working hard here and have not had much of a mental break, so the timing on this couldn't be better.

I will spend a couple of weeks in Ontario...one week in Toronto at my Aunt and Uncles and then a week up north in the Orillia area, including a couple of days at my old cottage. I will then spend the last 5 days in BC, including a weekend with my close buddy Marc on Denman Island. I will keep my apartment here in Taipei and continue on with this life I have got going here. A life that I would describe as proportionately joyful and with a real shot at a happy ending.

So I just put a photography website together myself... because it was just time.  Not because I want to monetize my art, but because I want there to be a stable place to view my work before I can bring it to a gallery. There are some thought provoking shots in there that grab the viewer, so I am quite happy with the effort. Its a good beginning and I look forward to adding to this site.

I reached my 7 year sobriety birthday last month and its funny how the mind can play tricks on you. Not long after the 7 year mark, my brain started to say to me that maybe I am so strong now...that I could probably handle the occasional beer, and this way I would live normally again with all the possibilities open. It said to me that this would be my final hurdle that nobody thought I could scale, and after I proved them all wrong...I don't know...I would be getting fucked on a patio again.

Insidious, after 7 years and hardly any cravings or thoughts, this starts to tug at my consciousness. Danger...warning...man I had to really deal with it. I had to play the tape through and really get hard core with my mind. No it wouldn't play out like that, it never has...maybe a couple of months of normalcy would be followed by god knows what.

Its all part of the journey. I accept that this kind of inconsistency in my brain is going to happen once in a while, I just will not be a slave to it.

I am in control of my life...and it feels great. Well, in as much control as anybody can have in a world full of chaos. Controlled chaos.

Taipei you are incredible, she is incredible...but I need a short break man, over and out for now.